SOMETHING’S GOT TO GIVE

We exited Canada near Detroit but somehow missed out the whole of the United States of America, ending up in Mexico. Just across the border was a sign pointing us towards Little Mexico Town where every other building was a cantina, every sign written in Espanola and, like so much of America, every next building is abandoned; shut up shop. We backtracked to remedy a wrong turn, whereupon a bunch of school kids loitering on the sidewalk made lewd gestures as we passed. I flicked the bird back. Natalie thought they would chase us with guns on their BMX Mongooses.

Again days blurred into each other and ennui set in. I have rarely been so bored. The land of the free, nation of impenetrable deserts, impassable mountains, imperial cities, impressive monuments, imploding canyons, immeasurable forests, implausible mile-wide rivers, impeccable museums, impoverished ghettoes and impeached presidents, and I was with an impossibly beautiful young girl yet bored to tears. Our lives consist of waking up late, driving somewhere, getting lost, arguing about getting lost, finding a Walmart and sleeping.

Repeat ad infinitum.

I feel like I’m living my life on pause, like an 80’s mix tape you make for a girl you fancy at school, stretching until the only conclusion - it snaps. If I’m running away, do I need to get back to London and face the music?

Sitting in a café stealing wifi and downloading the Bourne Trilogy, Natalie looked up her ex-boyfriend on facebook. You remember James? Well it turns out James is heading off to the same city, in the same country as we have been planning to teach English in… That’s one hell of a coincidence. I thought I got rid of him, for once and for all, but you know what they say about bad pennies. Gandalf was right; it turns out the Gollum-looking creature may have a part to play after all. Why he wants to teach English there of all places I don’t know, why he wants to teach English at all… we tried to work out his motives with me concluding that he is a freak with no dreams of his own, so he needs to steal other people’s. Loser.

Like I say, teaching English in Chiang Mai is an option, Nat says I’d be good at it, but is it what I want?

One of my dreams is tornado chasing, but I’m in the wrong part of America at the wrong time of year.

I’ve also been dreaming of going back to college. A lot. Maybe I should join that Scriptwriting for Film and Television course I got onto thirteen years ago…

Living in Central America sounds pretty cool too.

Dangerous but cool.

Would look good on the CV though.